“Take it off,” Rey says the moment their bond opens and she’s greeted with the sight of molded chrome winking at her in the darkness.
“Or what?” The modulated voice that sounds decidedly more like Kylo Ren than Ben Solo asks.
She doesn’t have an answer as she can’t think of a conceivable threat. She used to be so good at coming up with them, especially where he was concerned.
Rey never really got dirty talk. She didn’t hate it, she just never understood the appeal. She’d tried with previous encounters, but it always felt weird and uncomfortable.
And then along came Ben.
For all his initial awkwardness and inexperience, Ben says the filthiest things to her in the bedroom and she loves it. Ben tells her what her cunt feels like, what he wants to do to her, what things as simple as biting her lip do to him. And Rey, who can’t hear the word “pussy” without giggling madly, moans whenever he murmurs in her ear, feels her walls flutter every time he tells her how he’s going to fill her with his cum.
“I know your cunt so well I feel it in my dreams,” he tells her, driving into her in a way that sends her toes curling. “I’ve memorized the way you feel when you come.”
The noise Rey makes is indecent.
“You’re close,” he murmurs. “But you won’t come until I’ve fucked you harder, will you?”
Rey can only whimper, grabbing fistfuls of sheets as he grips her hips and thrusts harder. She buries her face in the bed, but he pulls her hair until her back is arching and her head is tilted back.
“No,” he tells her. “I want to hear you come. I want to hear the things my cock does to your pretty little cunt.”
She comes undone at that, singing a mad string of words she isn’t sure are real. Ben doesn’t release her even after she comes.
“You feel so good,” he babbles, his hips jerking erratically. “All hot and wet and waiting for me to fill you with my cum.”
And then he is filling her with his cum, hot and sticky and right, feeding the aftershocks of her own orgasm. Rey thrusts back against his cock, squeezing every last drop from him. The friction against her clit and the pulsing inside her has her riled up again.
And Ben, sweet, eager, wonderful Ben, gets on his knees and puts his mouth on her, licking up his own cum as he brings her closer to a second orgasm.
“My cum tastes so good coming out of you,” he murmurs against the lips of her sex. “I could eat this cunt all day.”
The mattress swallows up her cries, creaking and groaning as she bucks pitifully against his face.
“I don’t know what I did to deserve you,” he admits when she finishes.
A woman named Maude something was a co-host on the Collider SW show, and she went on a rant about Adam Driver. She called him 'foreskin-face' and thinks he's a 'little shit who thinks he's too good for Star Wars' all because he didn't laugh at her terrible jokes and puns when she interviewed him. It was actually kind of pathetic. Anways people are actually calling her out and the other host's out on twitter and their either ignoring comments or being totally dismissive. Makes me mad.
Someone is touchy that not every finds their jokes funny.
that is so pathetic.
Was this actually captured on camera?
Also I’m a little shocked that the Collider crew didn’t say anything, they’ve always been stupid and a bit trashy imo but they usually aren’t douchey toward actual actors.
I remember seeing Maude interview the cast - I was so embarrassed that I turned off pretty quickly, but yeah I can confirm that Adam did chuckle at her awful jokes.
@thesovereignempress Watch from 42:35 onwards. The only one who’s full of themselves is this bitch.
And here’s the video of her “amazing puns” during the press junket.
This whole thing is even more cringeworthy than I remembered.😬
I started to avoid collider a looooong time ago. Not only they usually miss completely the point of this movies, or scene etc…they would like just to see lightsabers and darth vader. But they are also quite arrogant…too too cringy
Fuck Collider. This shit is straight up bullying and absolutely disgusting. Also, it’s a good fucking way to ensure that your crew doesn’t get access to actors again.
I’m not gonna subject myself to either of them, it’s enough for me to know that it happened and where.
…did anyone in their comment section call them out on their shit?
And yeah Collider has always been terrible when it comes to SW, I’m not even saying that through a shipping lens.
Ben Solo was the kind of trouble that could break your heart.
Rey was sure of it.
Not that she had any experience with Ben Solos personal brand of trouble —but damn, how she wanted that experience— No, Rey had been lusting after him for months, and he kept her at a safe distance.
She had wanted him the first time they met; and that was before she even got a whiff of his scent. So really this whole situation shouldn’t be that big of a surprise.
Or
Going into heat, in the middle of the grocery store wasn’t Reys idea of a good time. Things get even more complicated when Ben offers to see her through her heat.
Rey didn’t join Kylo Ben, thus avoiding a toxic relationship of Twilight/50 Shades of Grey type it would be in his current emotional state
Kylo Ben didn’t follow Rey into resistance, thus avoiding the fate of the Phantom, dragon Tarasque and all other Beasts following their Beauties to pain at mob’s hands resistance would totally give him
Reylo didn’t go for secret marriage, thus avoiding the tragedies of Romeo and Juliet and Anakin and Padme
I can’t believe this ship has manouvered around every major shallow water awaiting BatB and enemies to lovers themes and for some people it’s actually a proof it’s sunk
This is what I’ve been saying. The narrative has been teed up for redemption and HEA almost perfectly. It’s exciting, particularly because the GA isn’t expecting it.
It is 2015 and you are Janet, the average Tumblr user, a White American girl in the age bracket of 17-22 (conditions sufficient but not necessary). Your life kinda sucks: Donald Trump is running for president, capitalism is destroying everything, including itself. It is a time of changes on a global scale and you don’t understand any of them. You don’t have a partner because of your insufferable personality and irrational sense of entitlement. You log in everyday on Tumblr dot com to spread the Holy Word: “Men are trash,” you type furiously on the keyboard; “the Straights are at it again!” You have a fair amount of followers and the number grows exponentially when you display your innate ability for in-depth political analyses. “Anyways,,, Nazis are bad,” you write, and your followers go nuts because their guru has spoken. “Wow, I can’t believe Nazis were bad! Thank you for educating me.” You shed a tear. Your opinion finally, finally counts something. I’m so smart, you think, as you proceed to write another post about toxic masculinity and White people. You are Tumblr famous now.
Like any average Tumblr user in the 17-22 age bracket, you are in the Marvel fandom stanning Straight White Male characters played by Straight White Male actors with mediocre acting skills who probably only managed to land the role because of their pretty face, something that doesn’t usually happen to Black and non-White actors in general. You feel a twinge of guilt in your stomach, so you rant everyday about the lack of representation in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The production of Black Panther is announced and relief flows through you: soon, you will be able to keep thirsting after that Straight White Male dick and reblog Black Panther gifsets to wash away your guilt and prop up your wokeness. You change your username in lesbian-steve-rogers and call it a day. You are a Tumblr Queen.
In late 2015 Star Wars: The Force Awakens dir. JJ Abrams comes out. It’s a 5/10 movie, copypaste of A New Hope and too Marvel-ish but prequels were even worse so it evens out. However, something happens: you notice that some people are actively shipping Rey and Kylo Ren together and it’s as if Christmas has come a week early. You feel it’s your time to shine. “lmfaooooo are you guys… for real? Shipping this??” and again, “is this,,,,, what Straight people do???”. You bless your followers with in-depth 100% accurate analyses of the movie: “Rey is Luke Skywalker’s daughter,” you explain to your followers, who would believe anything you say without questioning it. “Kyle Ron is a school shooter.” “Kylo Ren is actually an incel.” You try to remember that English class you took in high school. “There is enough textual evidence to agree that Kylo Ren browses /pol/ on a daily basis and he’s intended as a metaphor for alt-right 4chan Pepe posters.” You trust the teachings of Calvinism. Predestination is real, and Kylo Ren is irredeemable and set for eternal damnation. “I can’t wait for Rey to kill Kyle Ron, dance on his corpse and make out with Finn.” Your knowledge of psychology and statistics is remarkable, even though you have not even graduated college. “People shipping Reylo are more likely to condone abusive relationships, I know for sure there is causal effect because it happened to my cousin after watching Twilight.” That’s it. You’ve put the entire American Psychological Association to shame. Your argument goes viral after TheMarySue publishes it and the Harvard Business School is considering offering you a place in the Statistics department given your exceptional ability to critically analyse phenomena and solve once and for all that annoying OVB problem. It’s time for you to drop the final bomb. “Reylo shippers hate women,” you write. “The tea is hot today,” your followers reply enthusiastically. You are a Tumblr God.
Two years later Star Wars: The Last Jedi dir. Rian Johnson comes out and you walk into the theatre ready to watch Kylo Ren twirling mustache doing Nazi stuff. The movie begins and something feels off. Yo mama jokes. Kyle does not kill his mother? You start sweating, and suddenly you feel catapulted in another reality where you are a Brazilian football fan watching the FIFA World Cup 2014 semifinal Brazil v Germany on the stands. Rey and Kylo Ren start acting friendly towards one another and every scene is a new nightmare. The Force is connecting them and Muller scores the first one. “You’re not alone” “Neither are you” and Klose and Kroos score three goals in four minutes. Rey ships herself to him? Khedira scores another. Throne room scene and Schurrle scores twice and makes it 7-0, but then Kyle is being Kyle again and Oscar makes it 7-1. You’re shaking. You’re David Luiz crying in front of the press. This is Trump’s America, you think, seething. You go back home and log into Tumblr dot com, almost smashing your keyboard. “Rian Johnson retire bitch.”
Six months into 2018 and Reylo is kinda mainstream and well-received by critics, but it’s not over yet. “JJ will retcon everything and make Kylo Ren and Rey switched at birth,” you say to your followers, now a little bit concerned. “Mark Hamill hates The Last Jedi,” you write. “Rian Johnson is a Nazi apologist.” “Daisy Ridley hates Adam Driv*r ugly ass.” It’s a conspiracy, you know it. You can’t be wrong. You channel your inner Larry shipper. “JJ wanted to make Rey Skywalker but Ruin Johnson stepped in and ruined everything.” But now there is a tingle in the back of your neck. Fear. Rey and Kylo Ren might really end up sucking face in the end. Your credibility is at stake. What do?
Suddenly, Spike Lee comes to your rescue: in his new movie, Adam Driver is a Jewish cop who goes undercover in the Ku Klux Klan.
Adam Driver dressed as a KKK member. Your brain cells start working and come up with what must be the undeniable truth. You muster your wokeness and, once again, you log into Tumblr dot com to spread the Holy Word.
“Adam Driver is a White supremacist ya’ll.”
Your job is done here.
It is time to catch up with Voltron now. Klance is endgame for sure, Sheith is a pedo-Satanic ship and there is no way Lance really likes Allura.
